I walked into the Oregon State Capitol building not sure what I was getting myself into. All I knew was that a meeting had been set up by some important people and they wanted to talk to me. I ended up in a room, somewhere down a hallway, up a stairway and around a corner (or three). I couldn’t tell you where I was if you asked me, but it turns out that I ended up sitting face-to-face with House Republican Leader Mike McLane, Mr. McLane’s assistant, State Representative Jodi Hack and a woman from Washington D.C. that was a campaign marketing specialist (or something like that). The young assistant pulled out a large leather chair for me to sit in. I hung my sloppy purse-bag on the back of the chair. Terrible idea. The long tattered strap slid right off the chair and my cloth purse-bag fell to the ground, the dangly charms that accessorized my glorious purse-bag made all sorts of ruckus as my chapstick, wallet, a couple of quarters and a Winco receipt fell out onto the floor. My purse-bag literally threw up on the House Republican Leader’s fancy carpet. I wanted to die, but thinking back… I’m not even sure anyone noticed. It was in that moment that I told myself, “It’s time to get a big girl handbag.”
This meeting was one of the most humbling, interesting and memorable moments in my life and it’s not one that I’ve shared with very many people. I was asked if I would consider running for State Representative. If I remember correctly, I LAUGHED OUT LOUD when they asked me. It was either that, or shit my dress. I was no where near being ready to do something like that. It was my personal work on suicide awareness that had somehow, made my name come up as a potential person they would actually endorse. Long story-short, you didn’t miss anything and I didn’t run for State Representative.
I did, however, splurge on a Kate Spade handbag, and as stupid as you might think this sounds, this handbag became a huge reminder to me that the things we do in life, even if we aren’t sure that anyone is listening or watching, DO matter. It was a token to remind me to continue speaking up. I had no idea that there were influential people listening to me. They obviously didn’t care what kind of purse I had. They cared about the work I was doing. I will never not talk about suicide awareness because it’s so personal to me. As most of us know, suicide does not discriminate. I am saddened by the news of Kate Spade and her suicide. Not because she made beautiful things for the rest of us to splurge on, but because she was also a wife and a mom. Let’s not forget that.
Resources:
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (1-800-273-TALK [8255])
American Foundation for Suicide Prevention